I came across with a story from one of my girl friend today...
Let's call her "S"...
It's regarding a proposal from her bf to her...
oups.. don't got mistaken.. proposal not as in.. the bf proposed to her...
:P
okay.. the story is like this..
S's bf asked her the following :-
1) whether he can go to oversea to work. He proposes Singapore or perhaps Hong Kong...
(i guess main intention is to earn $$ of foreign currency)
but i have no idea y is this 2 country la...
*u know la.. Singapore dollar to Malaysia ringgit is about S$1 = RM2.40*
2) whether S could follow him together to work together there..
(FYI, S is currently working in Malaysia and do not have any plan to change work to another country...)
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Actually.... As a matter of fact.... S has not been to oversea to work b4 and has all her family members here wiith her in Malaysia.... Therefore, she's kinda reluctant to move on with the proposal.
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S's bf asked her whether he could follow him to Singapore (let's say) and establish their world together there...
as in...
1) to locate place to stay (i suppose, share the cost with him);2) to find a work (for each of them);
3) to ensure that their relationship could be maintained (the bf is afraid that they would broke off.. if he's to proceed himself to Singapore); and
4) to earn SING DOLLAR ( $$$$$$$$$).
this is a 4 in 1 SUGGESTION....
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Anyway, S's bf knews that S is kinda home sick and has all she needs in Malaysia...
Therefore, he proposes another alternative.. that sound like this.... :-
He will actually go over to Singapore 1st, let's say about 3-6 months earlier b4 S coming over to join him.... while the others all remained the same...-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Also, as a matter of fact, S's bf believes they could learn n earn even more, for working in Singapore, as compared to Malaysia..
of course, with all the KIASU, KIASI attitute... all in...
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okay... S is in doubt now....
I suppose these are what she can do....:-
1) to proceed with the plan of the bf (i.e to go to with him, leaving her family here)
2) to asks the bf to go himself.... she will fully support him (morally ma...)
or
3) to ask the bf to shut up and stay back in Malaysia.. if he loves her....
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Also, out of my curiousity...
Did any of u all.. experience this b4??
If u r S... which option would u choose??
(from a MALE or FEMALE point of view, is FINE....)
^.^
*PLS COMMENT!!!*
i think S needs everyone's help...
* Sorry S..... just don't comment.. Then no1 will know is u... :P
Just wait for my fren's constructive's feedback... i guess they could helps u...
=) *
A comment from Snoopy...
ReplyDelete(ask her reply here.. she gives me in MSN... =.=")
for me
i will go
cuz tak pernah pergi
try new thing
if really cant tahan
then only come back and find a new job
if can tahan, better
earn money and stay with her love one
macam ni lo
the last suggestion also can take into consideration d...he go FIRST
hehheee
ME : so, after the bf settles all... u will go???
yupe
cuz she need to think of her's family ma
family sure scare u got no place to stay
the MAIN problem!
TQVM~~
ReplyDelete:D
more feedback pls~~
jean jean~ i dunno who your friend S is but this is from my point of view ler. *forgive me if i tok nonsense, haha*
ReplyDelete1) to proceed with the plan of the bf (i.e to go to with him, leaving her family here)
- i don't know how old is S, but if we're still young at this age we need to give ourself the chance to explore things in a different country. don't let your "do not have intention" hold you back from doing the things, you never try you will never know. another thing is when u n your bf is at the other country, both of you can go through those difficulties of ups and downs together than just him alone being in a foreign country. if u look it in a positive way, you have a loving bf who wants you to be with him wherever he is but if u look it i a negative way, he is selfish wanting u to be with him leaving your own family behind and not think about how you feel.
2) to asks the bf to go himself.... she will fully support him (morally ma...)
-long distance relationship is hard to maintain because both of you will be independent on your own when there is a problem. it will make u feel distanced from one another because both of you can only hear but not help with the problem through the phone. your relationship problem will start to come in later (i have a friend who experienced that even though they have been together for very long). by the way, im not pouring cold water but out of so many people only a few can maintain the long distance relationship =)
3) to ask the bf to shut up and stay back in Malaysia.. if he loves her....
-you are being very selfish because you hold back you bf's future. in the future, he will blame u because for me, in a relationship you shouldn't hold back your partner's dream. you got to let him try and decide whether is he capable.
hope i helped you to advice your friend ler jean. haha.. if its meant to be, they will be together. just follow with the flow cause everything will fall into place if its the right path going through all the obstacles =)
Pam.. i like ur last phrase..
ReplyDelete[if its meant to be, they will be together. just follow with the flow cause everything will fall into place if its the right path going through all the obstacles =) ]
this is what i told my fren too..
:D
eh... u should choose 1 decision ma...
in the case that, u r S...
oh ya.. one more thing.. after an analysis..
ReplyDeletei noticed that.. no matter support or ask him not to go...
both might have a blame later on..
Let's say..
1) if go together (i.e. support) - and turns out that it's a wrong choice...
the bf will surely blame the gf... y that time u don't stop me??
2) if don't let him go - the bf might blame her.... y u don't let me go?? if i'm to go de... i'm a millionaire now...
-bla bla bla-
let your friend decide on her own ler, later we all support that option she go follow blindly then put the blame on us. haha.. she should know what she wants, not us telling her to go with which option. blekz...
ReplyDeletehahaha... i notice this is the best attitute of human...
ReplyDeletenever try to decide for others...
:D
In my opinion...
ReplyDelete1) to proceed with the plan of the bf (i.e to go to with him, leaving her family here)
This is a good alternative as both of them can share a same dream together... If they r still young, then they shall think of their future n start building on it from now so that they can have a good one.
In addition, I am not sure bout ur fren's parents' age... Let just assume that the parents are still young(as in 50s), then she shall give herself a chance to venture into different countries to gain more experience as well as earn more $$...
In the future, when ur fren plans to settle down and the parents is going into their 65++, then she can come back M'sia to work n be near to the parents...
As in my opinion, this shall be a WIN WIN situation.
2) to asks the bf to go himself.... she will fully support him (morally ma...)
This is not the best alternative as it is not easy to maintain LDR...
As analyze by Pammie, this will result in a break up... so what future they will hv together?
If ur fren wish to be with the bf, then they shall not take this choice as they might lose out on relationship along the way as time will loosen out the bond between them...
3) to ask the bf to shut up and stay back in Malaysia.. if he loves her....
This is definitely a NO NO NO choice...
Ur fren will be absolutely SELFISH is she insist that the bf stay in M'sia with her...
In the future when the bf think back, surely there will be a blame on ur fren as the she stop him from working in overseas.
We as a human will always think that the things that we cant get in the future is always the best....
So, ur fren shall not stop the bf from going...
In fact, she shall follow him...
So, the best solution is the boy will go there earlier to start up everyth...
wait till things are established, then ur fren can go in to join....
So this will again be a WIN WIN WIN situation...
=)